Rosemary, Heaven restores you in life.
cesalt
|
September 21st 2023
A man in a half-assed arabesque in a casino

This is an image of my friend in a casino that I took.

We drove hours through the desert to get there.

He lost all the cash he brought.

So did I.

Is my stomach still upset from the spicy chicken sandwich?

I wish the answer was "no".

Did I need some escapism yesterday?

Hell yes.

I've been thinking about the idea of leaving a legacy.

Some of my friends are talking about having kids.

I don't want kids.

And even if I did, I can't afford it.

I'll be 33 tomorrow.

63 years younger than my Grandfather if he makes it through today.

I know one couple my age with a child.

They are brilliant, kind, empathetic, caring people who love their daughter.

They both can drink me under the table.

I wish I saw them more, but kids, ya know?.

I hope I'm remembered as helpful.

At least for a little while.

Because in one hundred years no one will remember you or me.

-

A couple years ago my friends and I tried to open a bar.

We drafted a business plan.

Rounded up funding.

Toured spaces.

Negotiated with landlords.

But we failed.

I don't know if it was self sabotage or the untenable idea of paying $5,000 a month for 1,000 square feet.

Everything has been purchased.

Life is unaffordable.

The world is boiling.

On the brightside, I think I'll get an iced coffee and an avocado toast today.

-

Geography and religion are weird.

Where you are born and raised impact faith more than anything else.

Alabama === Protestant

Utah === Mormon

Republic of Maldives === Muslim

Czech Republic === Atheist

And lucky you.

You just happened to be born where the one true religion is practiced.

-



The above is "Evil" by Interpol.

It's an indie rock song from their album, "Antics", released on September 27, 2004, by Matador Records.

I hated Interpol 20 years ago.

I read about them in Spin Magazine.

I think I was a little too proto for their punk.

Since then, I've come to obsess over their strange lyrics and off kilter melodic lines.

They are a crummy live band.

Paul Banks isn't a great singer.

Carlos D. just up and left.

But "Evil" is a great song.

As with "Lo Tom" I didn't really get into "Antics".

But this song is angsty, shithead, depressed, and worried late teens / early twenties for me.

I still feel worried.

And I still love this song.

🫠

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